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Test Run

05/4/2012

You don’t realize the noise someone’s energy makes until it is quiet.

I don’t mean the sounds of walking or breathing.  Nor the coughs, the chuckles, or tapping of the foot.

I mean the sound of someone’s presence.  The sound of them just being there.

It’s interesting how that kind of quiet amplifies your own presence.

Or makes you more aware of it.

It’s been quiet on the blog.

Because it’s been quiet in the house.

I’ve been away.

From the blog and from the house.

Temporarily.

Granny has not been doing so well.  She has been in the hospital for almost two weeks.

The last week at a hospital out of town.

I’ve been out of town with her.

I came home for a day.

To make sure the mundane tasks of living life don’t get away from me.

Her energy is still in the place, but it dissipates without her here.

I think the universe is giving me a test run.  Preparing me for the day when it’s all gone.

She is improving, so I do believe it’s only a drill.

But in my gut, I also believe it may be the beginning of the final run.

[ fin ]

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There are 28 comments in this article:

  1. 05/4/2012Tony says:

    Hugs my friend!

  2. 05/4/2012rayrayj says:

    I”ll keep you and granny (and the attorney) in my thoughts

  3. 05/4/2012Sue says:

    I’m keeping you both in my thoughts Tony.

  4. 05/4/2012jack says:

    our thoughts are prayers are with you, Granny and the attorney. Missed reading you, now we know why.

  5. 05/4/2012jdw says:

    You hang in there. You have already done more for her than many people do in a lifetime. Being able to live in her own house is why she is still able to live. I will cross my fingers for you and say a prayer.

  6. 05/4/2012Cb says:

    I was wondering about your absence. I was hoping it wasn’t this.

    You and your gran are in my thoughts.

  7. 05/4/2012irisgirl says:

    A beautiful observation about energy and presence…….and like your other “regulars”, I’ve come to regard you, Granny and the Attorney as part of my extended family. So I also send my hugs and thoughts and prayers, and hope you can bring Granny home soon

  8. 05/4/2012Laura says:

    You and Granny are so fortunate to have each other. My thoughts are with you both.

  9. 05/4/2012Jeff M. says:

    Hugs and warm thoughts from the west coast. Hope Granny is comfortable and that she comes home soon.

  10. 05/4/2012Alan says:

    You are both in my thoughts and prayers!! :)

  11. 05/4/2012Greg says:

    You’re all in my thoughts and prayers, my friend. Be well and peaceful. And give Granny an extra smooch from your online friends.

  12. 05/4/2012Martin Wisser says:

    *sigh you’re in my prayers now, both (and I have a glimpse of understanding, don’t want to pretend something I can’t be able to).

  13. 05/4/2012Lee says:

    A hug sent your way. I also was thinking the same as Cb. Prayers on their way.

  14. 05/4/2012David SHP says:

    I’m sorry, Tony. It saddened me to read your post. I hope Granny has a lot more time in your home.

  15. 05/4/2012Buddy Bear says:

    Wishing you the best at this difficult time…

  16. 05/4/2012Mark says:

    Good thoughts and hugs to you, granny and the attorney……. stay strong……

  17. 05/4/2012Chris says:

    You all are in my thoughts and prayers this evening.

    Chris

  18. 05/4/2012Michael says:

    Gentle peace to a gentle giant who’s going through a rough patch. And to Granny and the Attorney as well. Keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers.

  19. 05/4/2012Sean says:

    I hope granny’s home and well soon. You’re lucky to have each other.
    Be strong but remember to take care of yourself and to let the attorney take care of you.
    My thoughts are with you.

  20. 05/5/2012Kerry says:

    Sending you ALL good vibes, prayers and very positive thoughts.

  21. 05/5/2012Johnny says:

    Wishing you all the best, and hoping that Granny is home soon. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Please remember to take care of yourself. You and Granny are truly blessed to have each other.

  22. 05/5/2012Moby says:

    It may not bring comfort but take solace in knowing she lived a good and long life. Even better when she does go, she will do so knowing she leaves a strong, virbrant, smart, and well-rounded such as yourself. I can think of no better gift and I’d bet money it gives her peace to know you are happy.

  23. 05/5/2012Moby says:

    that was supposed to be “leaves behind a man such as yourself.” Not sure what happened. lol

  24. 05/6/2012Carl says:

    Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. Wishing Granny well and able to recover. Peace.

  25. 05/6/2012charley says:

    Tony, granny and you are in my thoughts!

  26. 05/6/2012hamboner63 says:

    Hope Granny is better and home soon. I’ll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers

  27. 05/6/2012Erik Rubright says:

    *hugs*

  28. 05/7/2012royster says:

    so sorry to hear, but if anyone can survive this, your clan can. Because you’re the man at the center of the clan. Your ability to take the vagrancies of life and inspire yourself and us with them…singular. Best thoughts with Granny always, and here’s how i put it in writing about what you as a person and your writing does for me personally and artistically (when comparing NINE THE MOVIE MUSICAL and A SINGLE MAN, in 2009):

    “In looking at the films nearly together, it strikes that the contrast is each male lead’s retreats into fantasy/flashback, and the filmmakers use fragments of the naturalistic world (images, sounds, spoken snippets of conversations) to transition into more elaborate dream worlds. Their prosaic everyday surroundings, however, are not exactly like ours…in Ford’s, styled as a fashion shoot in tidy near black and white, and in Marshall’s, using the architecture of Rome and Venice (plus the cavernous soundstage of the film within the film) as settings for striking dramatic, nearly always theatrical, lighting (so much so that a “theatrical lighting consultant” is billed, much like Ken Billington’s amazing work on CHICAGO THE MOVIE MUSICAL). For the filmmaker at the center of NINE, the inner world explodes outward, transforming the soundstage into various looks for the ladys’ numbers…and the translation is the athletic use of the scaffolds and ladders and staircases, the camera cranes and catwalks, that both versions of his character manipulate. For the literary professor in SINGLE MAN, the “other world” turns ever inward toward romanticized memory, with images and associations from his past now caught up again in the aging female friend and the budding relationship he fumbles toward with two younger men, recalling his former younger lover.

    It occurs to me that Facebook is a similar “parallel reality” world we shape to our best interest, investing our time and energy, with the appropriate connections to our daily realities. Both Ford and Marshall pay due homage to their mentors and sources, with a wonderful credit to Tommy Tune for his original version of NINE on B’way (though not to the recent B’way revival, the popularity of which with Antonio Banderas and then John Stamos perhaps paved the way for the movie version). So though i am not nearly at the scale of either titan of their popular culture reigns, i too should acknowledge those whose have influenced my online presence so: for writing—the “West of Mayberry” blog with its predecessor by Tennessee Tony, the various chatroom theatre websites, and Jim Bernhard, who you’ll find among my Facebook Friends. For visuals, which i’m NOT at all good with yet cyberwise, there is my leaseholder buddy Alan’s CENTERFORWARD and SWIM NAKED sites (the latter of which is also beautifully and evocatively written). i started blogging after one of the hurricanes so devastated Houston that many friends and family were asking for updates, and it hooked me, as did this medium some of us call Crackbook now. How odd to think that in forty years, new filmmakers might be referencing the turn of this century as we reference the 60’s. Would that we make as good a showing then!”

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