Secret Lives of Attorneys

I’ve always loved this scene from “The Talented Mr. Ripley.” (If the video doesn’t come up, try re-loading page.)

In fact it made me crush on Jude Law for a while, until I gave him up for Gyllenhaal.

The semi-ambiguous sexual tension is off the charts.

And when Dickie catches Ripley in the mirror…ugnh!

The Attorney caught me spying on him through the mirror the other night.

Except it didn’t have a fraction of the heat this scene does.

But it was sweet.

And one of the funniest damned moments of my life.

I had to pick up some things from a store near his house, so I decided to drop by.

Unannounced.

I guess because of the music he had on the stereo, he didn’t hear me let myself in or say hello.

I went up to his bedroom, where I saw him through the open bathroom door.

He was doing a little maintenance on his body hair and dancing to Al Green while checking his physique in the mirror.

It was a pure moment of private vanity.  A moment like we all have with ourselves in our own ways.

And I got to witness it.

The bubble burst on the magic moment when he caught a glimpse of me in the mirror and jumped ten feet in the air.

“What are you doing???”

He got a little grumpy when he answered that he was just getting ready for bed.

I guess it was his defense for feeling embarrassed by being caught.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were getting ready for a date, playing soul music and trimming you stuff,” I said, trying to lighten the mood.

But, it didn’t really work.

I had seen something I wasn’t supposed to.

But, I’m glad I did.

Because I realize that the couple of minutes I silently stood there, seeing him completely uninhibited, gave me more than a good chuckle.

It made me fall in love all over again.

[ fin ]

§ 8 comments

Shortlink

The Labrador Takes A Trip

The Greyhound saw the Labrador romping in the wild flowers.

Rolling, jumping, and playing in the fields.

The Greyhound didn’t find any of this unusual.  That’s how the Labrador always was.

The Greyhound also knew it wasn’t just everyday rolling, jumping, and playing.  The Labrador was excited about his new friend, the Corgi.

So excited that he was grinning.

The kind of grin that Masters tended to claim was like theirs.

“We’re heading on a trip,” the Labrador said, bounding toward the Greyhound.  ”Me and the Corgi.”

But, happy as the Labrador was, he seemed a little anxious, too.

“I’m not sure which way we should go,” he confided to the Greyhound.

“Sometimes you don’t know,” the Greyhound thought out loud.  ”But you go anyway and see where you end up.”

For thirty-five years the Greyhound had been travelling that way with the Great Dane.

That’s five in Master years.

“Where do you and the Great Dane end up,” the Labrador asked.

“Right where we are,” the Greyhound answered.  ”A little further down the road, but still a whole lot closer.”

Which is always a good place to be.

[ fin ]

§ 7 comments

Shortlink
sugarhumps
Enlarge 5 Comment

Sugar Humps

I love seeing light hair against tanned skin.  Always make me think of spun sugar.

This would turn me into a diabetic.

§ 5 comments

Shortlink

Non-Birthday

Granny will have her 95th birthday at the end of the month.

On March 31st.

She thought it was last Saturday.

The 3rd.

I don’t know if she thought it was her 95th or not.  But she definitely got it in her head that it was her birthday.

Maybe because 3 and 31 are similar.

Or maybe because she’s almost 100 and tends to get things mixed up.

Not being here every day, the Attorney is not as used to Granny’s random disconnects as I am.   He has trouble just letting it ride.

“Even if it’s not her birthday, we can’t let her go through the day thinking that we forgot about her,” he worried.

I had trouble convincing him that we didn’t have to stress over a card or a cake or flowers or any of the things he felt like we should do on for her birthday-that-really-isn’t-her-birthday.

“She won’t remember it long enough to feel forgotten.”

He gets frustrated with me when I say things like that.  But if you live very long with someone who’s mind skips around, you have to learn to pick and choose just what you’re going to go on alert about.

So, I just told a her a little white lie, saying it was still the end of February and not the end of March.

And that I turned the calendar over too soon.

“Oh, I hope we don’t have any bad luck.”

Her focus shifted to superstitions, so I’m pretty sure she bought it.

She likely won’t think of her birthday again until I put a pound cake in front of her on the 31st.

But, despite my best efforts, the Attorney couldn’t stop himself from making quick trip to the store for the inevitable celebration that was never going to come.

Neither of us eats ice cream much, so “on sale,” was the official answer about the pints when Granny asked what the special occasion was.

Thankfully that was before he could give her a card that would remind only her of her non-birthday.

Now he can just save it for the actual day.

[ fin ]

§ 7 comments

Shortlink
treeforthe
Enlarge 5 Comment

Can’t See The Trees

What’s the old saying?

Can’t see the trees for the fuckable rump?

§ 5 comments

Shortlink
burymound
Enlarge 7 Comment

Modern Burial Mounds

Hmm…whatever shall I bury in there?

§ 7 comments

Shortlink

Tell You What It Means To Me

I was being a whiny baby on Twitter (@largetony) over the weekend.

Basically I was feeling sorry for myself because of injuries I have been suffering from falling off a ladder a few days ago and I was pouting because The Attorney wasn’t here to take care of me.

Not that there was anything he could have done.  I’m just used to seeing him on the weekends and was feeling lonely and wanted him around.  But, he was away on a trip to Nashville.

I got a message from someone who basically said they couldn’t understand how I could put up with being in a relationship for five years where we only see each other once or twice a week.

The implication was that I am wasting my time.

Maybe I am naive (which is entirely possible when it comes to relationships for me) but isn’t better to have someone you really love some of the time than to have anyone else all the time?

Going through life “all or nothing” isn’t a way I want to live.  Too full a glass can be easy to spill, and you could die of thirst from an empty one.

But what is really interesting about the comment is that someone who is gay can’t seem to wrap their brain around the unconventional nature of my relationship with The Attorney.

How is that possible when we are living in an age where the gay community is doing its damnedest to get the rest of the world to understand that a relationship doesn’t have to be conventional to be valid, happy, and strong?

Not that I’m trying to give my little slice of life’s pie the importance of something so global.  But, there’s a parallel there.

You gotta learn to respect to get respect.

Lordy, my inner Aretha is about to come out.

[ fin ]

§ 15 comments

Shortlink

Leap On

Leap year is way more complicated than I thought.  But, it’s really fascinating in this hilarious explanation.

§ 1 comment

Shortlink

Which Tony

The one question I am asked online more than any other is “Why do they call you Large Tony?”

I think most people who ask know exactly why, or at least have a pretty good idea why, but still just want to hear me verify the fact that I have a big ol’ pecker.

By no means the biggest out there any more than it’s the smallest.  But, you wouldn’t be calling it average, either.

What’s more interesting than why I have the nickname is how I got it.

I told the story several years ago on my first blog, but I figure enough new folks have come along since then that it may be worth repeating.

At least a short version.

Basically the name came about because someone used it as a way to distinguish me from another Tony at a party we had all attended.

The other Tony was known as “Steve’s Tony” because his identity was attached to his partner.  I became “Large Tony” because what was attached to me.

I’ve always sort of wondered why “Large” was the choice of words, instead of something more typical like “Big.”

But I like it.  The uncommonness makes it my own.

[ fin ]

§ 6 comments

Shortlink
tumblr_kqnztoSfRr1qa2j1uo1_250
Enlarge 4 Comment

Doink-Doink

I found this at one of my favorite sites to browse, Porncake.  I just had to share it.

God touches us in so many ways.

§ 4 comments

Shortlink
pass-receive-crop
Enlarge 11 Comment

Quarterback or Wide Receiver? (nsfw)

I can’t tell if he just passed the football or is ready to catch it.

Continue Reading →

§ 11 comments

Shortlink

WTF-TV

I keep seeing promos on TV for a new show called “GCB.”

What happened to giving a show a title that gives you at least some clue about what you are going to watch?

Besides being a terrible and awkward title for a show, “GCB” apparently stands for “Good Christian Bitches,” a much more interesting title that ABC thought was too extreme.

But, is “Good Christian Bitch” so common a term that it has a familiar acronym?

That’s the kind of phrase that southern gay men of a certain age would toss around and lap up like their toy poodles would a mint julep.  I have lived in the South all my life and never heard anyone use it.

So who really knows what “GCB” means?

IBM has been around since the 50′s and although everybody knows it’s computers and stuff, I think a lot don’t know exactly what the letters stand for.

For all the info you get from the title, “GCB” could just as easily be called “CWW” (Catty White Women).

Every time I hear “GCB” I think of “HGH” (Human Growth Hormone), and figure its a show about people with “BDD” (Body Dysmorphic Disorder).

If folks aren’t able to figure out what to expect, I’m thinking “GCB” will be “GBS” (Gone By Summer.)

§ 7 comments

Shortlink